All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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