just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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