You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
50% drunk capacity currently
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
