are you so shy because you have an std?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
