I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
