garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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