Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Randomize
