plz talk dirty to me
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
