SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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