Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
