i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
