At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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