hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
