I wanna bring you to show and tell
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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