I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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