i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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