Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
