Hey man sorry I got all grabby
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
