I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
