he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
