You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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