I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
