just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
