Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
