So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
