oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
