Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
