you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
