if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
