capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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