We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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