After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I will be naked everywhere
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
