kristin has been a bad kristin
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
