Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize