Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
