i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Terrible idea I love it
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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