it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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