no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
