Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
literally had 100 drinks last night.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
