I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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