dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
