JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
