yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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