I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
