Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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