dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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