Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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