I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
