we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
