I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
